Anger – the continuum of emotions
We may find ourselves in difficult situations with a range of emotions. Our feelings may range from irritation to frustration and then escalate to anger. Knowing where we are in the scale can help us adopt the appropriate tactic to respond (irritation——–frustration—–anger) . In my experience people are often angry because they are full of fear. When I feel afraid I find I benefit from self-coaching and looking at my self-talk. The acronym that comes to mind for FEAR is false expectations appearing real. My clients find it helpful to look at their expectations and judge how realistic they are. When they respond rather than react, they find they are proactive and more in control of situations they find themselves. Humour can help as well as the games people can play. Challenges and difficult situations can be dramatic. Sometimes situations can be challenging because change is not being managed appropriately or because the requisite component is team working and members of that team do not want to work with each other.
We’ve found that when individuals recognise the significance of the big picture and take responsibility for painting the picture and filling in the spaces, everything works so much better.
What can help?
- Politely saying ‘no’. If you never say no, what is the value of your yes?
- Know when to ask for help. Indicate when things are not working and what can be done about it.
- Shape your strategies – what will work out through practice?
- Give feedback – be specific; identify specific experience
- Reflect on your learning so you are ready the next time
- Build your confidence in dealing with situations effectively
- Build a better rapport with your; this can act as a stepping stone to dealing with delicate situations
You have a better working day and
You find that dealing with difficult situations while uncomfortable can be an amazing stepping block.